


Come Back Home

by fixedstar



Category: VICTON (Band)
Genre: Angst, How Do I Tag, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Sejun is a Ghost, everyone is sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 19:14:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,650
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26134048
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fixedstar/pseuds/fixedstar
Summary: Everyday since Sejun's death, Byungchan visits Sejun's grave to weep and lament. Everyday since his death, Sejun's spirit, bound to the realm of the living until those closest to him let him go, cries with Byungchan because he just wants Byungchan to move on and be happy.
Relationships: Choi Byungchan/Im Sejun
Kudos: 18





	Come Back Home

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written in ages, please forgive any mistakes

He's here again.

Sejun watches, sitting next to his own grave as Byungchan kneels in front of it and starts to cry. 

"Sejun, please, come back." Byungchan whispers, looking at the tombstone which has Sejun's name engraved on it as if Sejun would magically appear if he continues to stare at it long enough. "Please, I can't live without you."

Next to him, Sejun cries. He wishes he could hold Byungchan or kiss away all his tears. He does not do either. Not because he does not want to, but because he can't. No matter how hard he tries, how hard he yells, Byungchan can neither see nor hear him. And so Sejun is forced to watch as Byungchan breaks down in front of his grave and destroys himself every single day.

The first time, right after the funeral, Byungchan had been eerily calm. He hadn't said anything and despite letting the tears fall freely, he hadn't let out a single sob. Perhaps he was still processing Sejun's death then. 

The next day, however, was a completely different story. Byungchan cried his heart out, shouting at the skies and begging Sejun to return. Sejun tried reaching out then, tried holding him in his arms, but his body went right through Byungchan's lean frame. He continued trying to talk to him, desperate, but by the fifth day, Sejun has realised that his attempts were futile. The only thing he can do is watch as the love of his life is reduced to nothing but a shell of what used to be a bright young man.

It starts to rain. 

Byungchan has already been there for two hours but he doesn't make a move to find shelter. His phone is thrown on the grass and Sejun has noticed it buzzing on and off but Byungchan hasn't bothered checking it. Thunder rumbles in the distance but Byungchan still doesn't move. 

"Please, come back. Just come back" Byunchan whispers, over and over again, almost silent under the constant thunder and lightening.

If Sejun could talk to him, if he could just reach out to him, if he was still alive, he would grab Byungchan and drag him home. Byungchan gets sick easily, and is always getting injured one way or another. Standing out there in the rain is definitely going to result in a sick Byungchan and if that happens, Sejun won't be able to take care of him the way he did when he was alive.

He understands though. He understands Byungchan's refusal to go home. They had shared an apartment together. Every little thing there, from the furniture that they picked out together to the photographs on the wall held both their traces and memories. If the roles were reversed, Sejun would be doing the exact same thing as Byungchan. That doesn't do anything to diminish his anger though.

Why can't Byungchan just move on? Why can't he be happy?

That's all Sejun's ever wanted. For Byungchan to be happy. He wants the boy who lit up his entire universe to have everything he needs, everything he wants. Before Byungchan, Sejun's universe was impenetrable, brimming with darkness. Then Byungchan came into his life without warning, knocking down all his defences with ease. And with him he brought the moon and the stars, illuminating what was once an inky canopy of darkness. 

The rain continues to lash down, torrential and unforgiving. Byungchan is shivering furiously and he looks like he's going to collapse any second. Sejun thinks that he himself might keel over with the amount of worry he has for Byungchan. Knowing Byungchan and his weak immune system, he's probably already developed a fever. What if it turns into somethings worse? Something like the flu? Or hyperthermia or something?

"Damn it, Byungchan! Go home!" Sejun yells, getting up from the ground. It's a futile attempt because he knows Byungchan cannot hear him but he tries anyway. 

A car brake screeches behind them and Sejun sighs in relief as he sees Chan's red minivan. Seungwoo gets out, making his way towards Byungchan. He doesn't have an umbrella and is completely drenched in a matter of seconds. Byungchan doesn't seem to have noticed though, still repeating the words 'come back' like a mantra. 

"Byungchan," Seungwoo calls out, looking worried. It's in this moment that Sejun thanks the heavens for their friends. God is cruel, tearing him way from Byungchan and forcing him to watch his husband destroy himself but at least He has blessed them with wonderful friends. Sejun cannot imagine, doesn't want to imagine, the state Byungchan would be in if their friends did not take him home every single time. 

"Byungchan," Seungwoo repeats as Chan gets out from the drivers seat. Byungchan finally gets up, turning around to face his friends but he refuses look at them, choosing to stare at the grass instead.

"Come on, Byung. You're going to get sick. You can stay at our place so please, let's go." Seungwoo says. He talks to Byungchan as if he's a tiny scared animal, ready to bite or make a run for it. 

"No," Byungchan says and if he could, Sejun would shake him by the shoulders and knock some sense into him. "I can't! I can't leave! He has to come back. He's going to come back!" Byungchan cries, falling to the ground.

"He's not going to come back, Byungchan! Sejun is dead and you know it. You are the one who identified his body!" Chan yells. His face is red and even in the rain, Sejun can tell that the older is about to burst into tears any second.

"Chan," Seungwoo starts, ready to intervene but is immediately cut off.

"No, he needs to hear this, Seungwoo!" Chan says shifting his gaze to Seungwoo before turning back to Byungchan. "Byungchan, I know you don't want to hear this but Sejun is dead. He's not going to come back, not even if you spend the rest of your life here. It's hard, I know that. You lost your husband and you have every right to mourn. Hell, I don't what I would be like if I lost Subin. But Byung, you're not-" Chan's voice breaks, "you're not the only one who lost him."

Byungchan finally looks up at Chan, tears mixing with the rain. Chan's words seem to have had an effect and Sejun feels his already broken heart shatter into a million more pieces.

"Byung," Chan continues, walking towards Byungchan and sitting down in front of him, uncaring of the wet grass digging into his thighs through the thin material of his jeans. "I lost him too, you know. My best friend. My brother. I've known him since we were in diapers. We were...we were supposed to grow old together but no-" Chan's voice turns sharper, angrier. "that idiot just had to break his promise."

Sejun laughs. Its loud, hysterical and by the time he's done his sides hurt and tears are streaming down his face. He doesn't know why he's laughing and in the back of his mind, he registers that this is not an appropriate response at all. Especially not when his husband and best friend are crying in the middle of a graveyard and one of his closest friends is in a similar state. He's a little grateful that none of them can see or hear him right now. He can't imagine how he looks, drenched in the rain and laughing like someone who belongs in a mental asylum. 

He can't help it though. He knows his death has hurt everyone around him but the impact has never been this clear before. It's all too much and while Sejun knows it's not his fault, he had never planned on dying the way he did, the pang of guilt hits him like a truck.

Beside him, the only living people at the graveyard stay silent, oblivious to Sejun's current state. It has stopped thundering and the rain has lightened but Byungchan is still shivering uncontrollably and Chan is slightly shaking. Seungwoo is standing a few metres away, watching his friends closely.

"Do you think-" Chan starts, getting up from the ground. "do you think Sejun would be happy to see the state you're in?"

Sejun looks up at Chan at the mention of his name. No, no he is not happy!

Byungchan opens his mouth to retort but closes it without saying anything.

"He's not going to be happy, Byung. If he is in heaven or whatever, he'll be watching after us. Watching after you. How do you think he'd feel if he saw you right now?" Chan asks.

Fucking terrible, that's how.

"He'd want you to move on, Byung. He'd want you to be happy. You can't keep doing this to yourself. It's been a month. Please, you're going to get sick. Let's go home." Chan says, voice getting softer with each word. They all hold their breath waiting for anything, anything sort of response at all from Byungchan. It feels like hours but in reality, it only takes a few seconds for Byungchan to slowly nod. Chan finally smiles a little for the first time since the funeral and drags Byungchan up by the arm, pulling him into a teary hug. Seungwoo joins them a moment later and although they don't know it, Sejun is hugging them too.

"God, you're trembling. Come on, lets get you both home. Sik will make you hot chocolate." Seungwoo says, letting go and taking in Byungchan and Chan's states. 

Sejun watches from a distance with a gentle smile as Seungwoo and Chan lead Byungchan into the minivan but then, he sees Byungchan turn back to look at his grave one more time and his smile disappears, the realisation dawning upon him like a storm descending on an unassuming rural village. 

Byungchan will be back again the next day.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading, I hope you enjoyed it.


End file.
